Thursday, January 18, 2018

Today in Nerd Hatred: Star Wars fan edit!

Some guy cut the Star Wars movie down to 47 minutes. That's a hell of a feat in and of itself, the movie is interminable. How did he do it? Took out all the female roles.

"Star Wars: The Last Jedi" has garnered both praise from critics who lauded its departure from the franchise's formula, and ire from long-time fans who say it missed the mark. Chief among the complaints, beyond the unbalanced pacing and needless subplots, concerned the movie's heavy-handed progressive messaging.

To that end, an anonymous user—a troll with too much time on their hands—created a 47-minute cut of the film with its female presence drastically cut down. It's a hundred minutes shorter than the actual movie, the cut is as linear as a bad dream and it focuses entirely on its male characters without any of the character development given to Rey—one of the The Last Jedi's finer elements.

Called "The Last Jedi: De-Feminized Fanedit (aka The Chauvinist Cut)," the cut-down version is clearly intended to satirize the complaints about the movie's heavy focus on Finn's aimless sidekick, Rose (who's referred to as "Asian chick" and "China girl), and the pink-haired admiral played by Laura Dern. Most of their scenes, along with Leia's and Rey's, are significantly reduced.

At 47 minutes with no female dialogue, this cut is mostly explosions I'm sure. As a joke, perhaps a bit amusing. Taking the piss out of Hollywood never gets old.

What's interesting today is the widespread media condemnation. The usual suspect SJW got their knickers in the expected twist, but in the wider media this thing made it to Univision, Fast Company, Buzzfeed, and so forth. Extremely hostile is an understatement.

Media is very invested in their feminism project, and they are going to slap down anybody who mocks or questions it. Hard.

The Phantom


WiFi Lunchbox Guy said...

If there are no significant female parts, then there is no need or opportunity for a "casting couch". Gots to keep the wimmins safe!

But that force-chokes the life out of #MeToo.

So yeah, the SJWs will go bananas. But that's a good thing.

The Phantom said...

Being a nerd is getting to be a pretty dangerous pastime. I'm thinking of ditching all this popular culture shit and take up breeding piranha. Or maybe braiding det-cord for miners. Something safer, you know?

WiFi Lunchbox Guy said...

Does this thing actually exist, or did an Onion article escape containment?
My google-fu isn't turning up viewable copies.

Sam L. said...

The HORROR!! The horror...of twisted knickers. And deodorant failure.

The Phantom said...

Har! ~:D