Cops are tracking your car too. Punks rioting anyway.

New revelation on Drudge today, police forces in the USA are tracking everybody's car.

Using automated scanners, law enforcement agencies across the country have amassed millions of digital records on the location and movement of every vehicle with a license plate, according to a study published Wednesday by the American Civil Liberties Union. Affixed to police cars, bridges or buildings, the scanners capture images of passing or parked vehicles and note their location, uploading that information into police databases. Departments keep the records for weeks or years, sometimes indefinitely.

As the technology becomes cheaper and more ubiquitous, and federal grants focus on aiding local terrorist detection, even small police agencies are able to deploy more sophisticated surveillance systems. While the Supreme Court ruled in 2012 that a judge's approval is needed to track a car with GPS, networks of plate scanners allow police effectively to track a driver's location, sometimes several times every day, with few legal restrictions. The ACLU says the scanners assemble what it calls a "single, high-resolution image of our lives."

ACLU publication here.

I guess the New York liberals who make up the ACLU finally clued that their beloved DemocRat party is set on crushing the ACLU under thumb along with the rest of us proles.

Now while the cops are busy recording every damn thing you do, they don't have time to arrest actual criminals.

At least 14 people were taken into custody Tuesday night and many more remained at large after marauding bands of young people conducted a string of robberies, assaults and acts of vandalism along Hollywood Boulevard, Los Angeles police said late Tuesday.

Incident commander Dennis Kato said police were inundated with phone calls beginning about 9 p.m., reporting that packs of young people were roaming along Hollywood and attacking people. Public information officer Rosario Herrera said at least one of the attacks was near Hollywood and Highland. 

The robbers knocked down tourists and grabbed their phones, Kato said. In at least one incident, they hauled off a cash register from a business. There were no reports of weapons involved in the attacks.

As many as 40 robbers were believed to be involved in the attacks. Kato said the robbers splintered into smaller groups of 10 to 15 people and spread through the area, regrouping at times. 

Police say the attackers appeared to be an organized group who knew one another. Officers swarmed the Hollywood area as helicopters for both police and news media circled.

Think the super-spy surveillance crap is going to help catch these pukes? Unlikely, right? But then it isn't meant to keep track of them. Its meant to keep track of YOU.

The Phantom

Revisiting Heidi Yewman: now with VIDEO!

Huffpoo has a video interview with Heidi Yewman about her Ms. Magazine blog article, My Month With A Gun.  I wrote about it here.  Ms. Magazine cancelled the rest of little Heidi's series after getting boiled alive by commenters, but then their "loyal fans" started in boiling them alive as well. So they released this statement here.

The Huff-and-Puff video is classic liberal. The gist of the conversation is that Heidi Yewman feels she is incapable of managing a firearm, but there is no legal entity (in her state) that will prevent her from owning and carrying a firearm. Plus it made her feel bad. :(

Also included, some pop-psychology misuse of science and some goof who used to be a cop.

Bottom line, she's complaining that some jackboot didn't march up and demand her papers.

Enjoy the barfalicious video.

The Phantom

Microsoft researchers can predict your physical location in the future.

We know that our phones constantly broadcast their (our!) location to cell towers, 24/7. We know that both the phone company AND the phone manufacturers (Apple/Google) keep this information. For a long time. Like, forever most likely. So they know where you've been to a very high degree of accuracy. Well now there's a paper by two guys who took all that data and wrote a program to predict where you are GOING to be at any given time on any given day.

Using information from a pool of 300 volunteers in the Seattle metro area, Sadilek and Krumm gathered a mountain of location data. As the volunteers went about their daily lives--going to work, to the grocery store, out for a jog, even for transcontinental travel--each carried a GPS device much the same way they carried a cell phone. To further ensure accuracy, the researchers also installed GPS devices in commercial shuttles and transit vans that the volunteers used regularly, and the volunteers' own vehicles. After collecting over 150 million location points, the researchers then had Far Out, the first system of its kind to predict long-term human mobility in a unified way, parse the data. Far Out didn't even need to be told exactly what to look for--it automatically discovered regularities in the data.

"For example, it might notice that Tuesdays and Thursdays are usually about the same and fairly consistent from week to week," the researchers told us. "Then when we ask about a future Tuesday or Thursday, the algorithm automatically produces a typical Tuesday/Thursday as a prediction."

Salidek and Krumm were pleasantly surprised with the results. It turns out that no matter how spontaneous we think we are, humans are actually quite predictable in our movements, even over extended periods of time. Not only did Far Out predict with high accuracy the correct location of a wide variety of individuals, but it did so even years into the future.

This does not seem like much of a problem for a computer. Comparing data is what they're for. The real problem is collecting the location points, in the research solved by a GPS unit. In our non-research real lives, this data is available from Apple and Google for a small fee. Also available to the NSA because they archive ALL OF IT. In fact, I would be shocked if the NSA doesn't already do exactly this type of prediction on an on-demand basis. Its obvious.

Well, apart from spying, what could such a system be used for?

For now Far Out is strictly a research project not yet available in commercial products or services. And although its focus currently is on the future whereabouts of single individuals, eventually, the researchers' hope is that it can be applied to larger populations. This could be a boon to urban planners by leading to more accurate predictions about the spread of disease, traffic congestion, and the demand for electricity.

On the social side, there could even be something like a Foursquare of the Future.

Marketers and advertisers, too, would relish the opportunity to target our future selves with ads like, "Need a haircut? In four days, you'll be 100 yards from a salon that will have a $15 special." On the social side, there could even be something like a Foursquare of the Future--who wouldn't want to know where their friends (and enemies) will be for the rest of their lives…or at least for the next 285 days?

Because that's what we all need and want in our lives. More planning and regulation, more ads on our phones, and people either stalking or dodging us with ever increasing accuracy.

I'm increasingly thinking that a portable phone may be a hell of a lot more of a millstone than a help, given that the Stazi would have all happily sacrificed a limb to get this level of surveillance on East Germany. Its a tyrant's wet dream.

The Phantom

and speaking of propaganda...

... the US government just repealed a very interesting law at a very interesting time.

For decades, a so-called anti-propaganda law prevented the U.S. government's mammoth broadcasting arm from delivering programming to American audiences. But on July 2, that came silently to an end with the implementation of a new reform passed in January. The result: an unleashing of thousands of hours per week of government-funded radio and TV programs for domestic U.S. consumption in a reform initially criticized as a green light for U.S. domestic propaganda efforts. So what just happened?

Until this month, a vast ocean of U.S. programming produced by the Broadcasting Board of Governors such as Voice of America, Radio Free Europe/Radio Liberty and the Middle East Broadcasting Networks could only be viewed or listened to at broadcast quality in foreign countries. The programming varies in tone and quality, but its breadth is vast: It's viewed in more than 100 countries in 61 languages. The topics covered include human rights abuses in Iran; self-immolation in Tibet; human trafficking across Asia; and on-the-ground reporting in Egypt and Iraq.

The restriction of these broadcasts was due to the Smith-Mundt Act, a long standing piece of legislation that has been amended numerous times over the years, perhaps most consequentially by Arkansas Senator J. William Fulbright. In the 70s, Fulbright was no friend of VOA and Radio Free Europe, and moved to restrict them from domestic distribution, saying they "should be given the opportunity to take their rightful place in the graveyard of Cold War relics." Fulbright's amendment to Smith-Mundt was bolstered in 1985 by Nebraska Senator Edward Zorinsky who argued that such "propaganda" should be kept out of America as to distinguish the U.S. "from the Soviet Union where domestic propaganda is a principal government activity."

Zorinsky and Fulbright sold their amendments on sensible rhetoric: American taxpayers shouldn't be funding propaganda for American audiences. So did Congress just tear down the American public's last defense against domestic propaganda?

Yes! Yes they did. Because clearly the mainstream media has been getting crushed by the internet fact-checking monster, and lately events are breaking on Twitter faster than CNN. So offhand I'd say the US Government just authorized a nice government funded propaganda machine in case the existing, 100% DemocRat owned media conglomerate collapses under the weight of its own bullshit.  Besides, now they can TELL guys what to print instead of just asking them to go along with the gag.

America, welcome to the wonderful world of the CBC. It will suck more than you are expecting.

The Phantom

Dear Media Party: The love affair is over, we want our keys back.

George Zimmerman show trial over, Zimmerman innocent. Duh.

But some guys just can't leave it alone, can they?

President Obama called on the nation to honor Trayvon Martin a day after George Zimmerman was acquitted of his murder by asking "ourselves if we're doing all we can to stem the tide of gun violence."

His comments came as family members of Zimmerman and Martin, as well as pundits, celebrities, and court observers had strong reactions to Saturday's not guilty verdict, with those reactions taking various forms — from joy and outrage to Shakespearean references and calls for peace.

This is an amazing thing. The very President of the United States of America is calling on his citizens to honor a drug-addled gang banger who was killed BY HIS VICTIM during his effort to break said victim's skull on the pavement. Said victim was shorter, lighter and weaker than "little Traaaaayvon", and would either be dead right now or living with serious brain damage if it wasn't for his Glock pistol.  Just so we are all clear what's being said here.

Barry is a DemocRat, and a "community organizer", plus his Justice department orchestrated this whole farce and bussed in "protesters" to make it happen. Time may well reveal further machinations within the Florida prosecutor's office were aided/abetted/paid for by the feds as well. We shall see. Therefore we expect Barry to come out with this kind of self-serving horeshit, because that's just how he rolls. Its not a surprise with this guy, its a well established pattern. You can set your watch by it.

Equally expected and established is the American (and Canadian!) media in full support mode, touting Obama's words.  Now, I use the term "touting" here for a reason. It means something important.

From Wikipedia:

In British English, a tout is any person who solicits business or employment in a persistent and annoying manner (generally equivalent to a solicitor or barker in American English, or a spruiker in Australian English). According to the American Bar Association, touting occurs when a person advertises, promotes, or otherwise describes a security for sale without disclosing that the person is being paid to do so.

An example would be a person who frequents heavily touristed areas and presents himself as a tour guide (particularly towards those who do not speak the local language) but operates on behalf of local bars, restaurant, or hotels, being paid to direct tourists towards certain establishments.

That describes to a T the behavior of the established Big Name media regarding this case. Obama wanted a prosecution, the media pushed and pushed and pushed. Obama wanted his name kept out of it, nobody mentioned  the DOJ organizing the astroturfing "protests" in Florida. Astroturf is that synthetic carpeting that famously looks like grass on TV, but isn't. An astroturf protester is somebody who looks like a regular guy on TV, but really he's an employee of the DemocRat party or possibly the Department of Justice. Or both!

Any of that mentioned in the linked NBC article? Nuh uh! Lots of fluffly kittens and rainbows, not much on the real facts of the matter. 

Except this little gem right at the very, very bottom. In italics:

George Zimmerman has sued NBC Universal for defamation. The company strongly denies the allegation.

I'm not a lawyer by any means, but just offhand I'd say Zimmerman has a pretty good shot at getting a royal payday out of NBC News. Because they frickin' edited audio, baby. They lied, denied, disinformed, demonized, misdirected and at the moment are reporting on riots against that little White Hispanic with breathless excitement. 

My hope is he scores a payout so enormous that he breaks the company. Like, BILLION$. Maybe the complete destruction of a major media network will wake up some shareholders. It could happen, right?

The Phantom

Electronic medical records: the ultimate bad idea.

Lots of push on these days for EMR, Electronic Medical Records. Government in Ontario is offering big, big discounts for all sorts of EMR services. Lots and lots of patient benifits are touted by the vendors and by government.

Here's the down side:

President Barack Obama said he wants to see state governments contribute more names of people barred from buying guns to the database, part of a sweeping set of executive actions he announced after a gunman killed 20 children and six adults at Sandy Hook Elementary School in Newtown, Connecticut, in December.

The database, called the National Instant Criminal Background Check System, or NICS, is used by gun dealers to check whether a potential buyer is prohibited from owning a gun.

States are encouraged to report to the database the names of people who are not allowed to buy guns because they have been involuntarily committed to a mental hospital, or have been found to have serious mental illnesses by courts.

Many states do not participate. So the administration is looking at changing a health privacy rule - part of the Health Insurance Portability and Accountability Act (HIPAA) - to remove one potential barrier.

The "potential barrier" they're talking about so coyly is doctor/patient confidentiality. What they are going to do is access all the Electronic Medical Records for the whole country and compare NICS hits (You think they delete those liek they're supposed to? Really?) to lists of people they judge to be mentally incompetent. This will of course be interpreted to include the largest possible number of people, because that's what this is about. Banning guns. So if you ever had to see a counselor,  or needed some anti-depressants for a couple months because of whatever, you will be on that list.

If your doctor uses electronic medical records instead of good old pen and paper, you should be very concerned. You should assume that government employees who are not your friends will be reading those medical records, and govern yourself accordingly. Patients and the VA have been having this problem for ten years now, the rest of the country is just catching up. And just because you're a Canadian is no reason to think that isn't going to happen to you. I'd be willing to bet its already happening, and they just can't legally admit it.  Pretty soon it will be legal, and things will start happening on the basis of what's in your file.

Coupled with the phone tapping and cell tower records, this is getting to be pretty complete coverage ain't it? Barry wants to know what you had for breakfast last Tuesday, he'll know. Just a button click away.

The Phantom

Well, this isn't at all disturbing.

Banner headline at Drudge this morning, OBAMA ORDERS FED WORKERS: SPY ON EACH OTHER

In an initiative aimed at rooting out future leakers and other security violators, President Barack Obama has ordered federal employees to report suspicious actions of their colleagues based on behavioral profiling techniques that are not scientifically proven to work, according to experts and government documents.

The techniques are a key pillar of the Insider Threat Program, an unprecedented government-wide crackdown under which millions of federal bureaucrats and contractors must watch out for "high-risk persons or behaviors" among co-workers. Those who fail to report them could face penalties, including criminal charges.

Obama mandated the program in an October 2011 executive order after Army Pfc. Bradley Manning downloaded hundreds of thousands of documents from a classified computer network and gave them to WikiLeaks, the anti-government secrecy group. The order covers virtually every federal department and agency, including the Peace Corps, the Department of Education and others not directly involved in national security.

Looks like Barack "Die Auserwählte"  Obama is turning to the Stasi's Big Book of Instructions for his new security policy.

In other news this morning, Zimmerman's show trial isn't going well:

On Monday, the Broward County Sheriff's Office released a video calling on the public not to riot in the wake of the George Zimmerman verdict, expected this week or next in Florida. The Sheriff's Office released a statement explaining that it was "working closely with the Sanford Police Department and other local law enforcement agencies" to coordinate "a response plan in anticipation of the verdict."

Because given the evidence trickling out via super-biased anti-WhiteHispanic TV news,  Zimmerman fired lying flat on his back to save his life. And should be given a good citizenship medal. The whole trial is total Soviet-style horseshit and was 100% put on to keep the visible minorities from rioting. If they find Zimmerman guilty he'll get off on appeal. If he doesn't, I expect it won't matter anyway because by then half the White population of the USA will be in FEMA camps.

And speaking of police state goon squads, this little gem here is a BEAUTY:

Police searched the Northern Virginia home of activist Adam Kokesh Tuesday evening and took him into custody for allegedly being in possession of hallucinogenic mushroom while also having a gun, authorities said. Kokesh, a former Marine, was held overnight at the Fairfax County Adult Detention Center, charged with possession of schedule I or II drugs while in possession of a firearm, said Lt. Steve Elbert, a spokesman for the Fairfax County Sheriff's Office.

Sounds pretty reasonable so far, "Police searched the home" kinda thing, no big deal right?

U.S. Park Police Lt. Pamela Smith said her agency executed a search warrant at Kokesh's home in Herndon about 7:45 p.m. Tuesday, looking for a weapon. The park police are the federal agency responsible for policing Freedom Plaza, the concrete park a few blocks from the White House where — in a video posted to YouTube on July 4 — Kokesh appears to load a shotgun in violation of D.C. gun laws.

Smith said she did not know if the YouTube video was the reason for the search warrant. Carrying a loaded weapon, concealed or unconcealed, is against the law in the District. The possession of a firearm not registered in the District carries a penalty up to a year in prison.

Yep, they just "executed a search warrant", nothing to see here, move along. Now we hear from Alex Jones something a little different:

According to a press release issued by Kokesh's Adam vs the Man media team, "Numerous police vehicles, including a light armored vehicle and two low-flying helicopters barricaded Adam's street. More than 20 armored SWAT team members surrounded the house, as well as a number of detectives, and plainclothes officers. Assault rifles were aimed on all members of the team as they were handcuffed without being told why they were detained. Masked and armored police in full "Storm Trooper" gear flooded in and ransacked the residence. The team was cordoned in a front room, while Adam was pulled aside for questioning."

Roads around Kokesh's home, which also contains his broadcast studio, were blocked off and other residents were told to stay indoors. The raid was conducted by Herndon police as well as US Parks Police, an arm of Homeland Security.

Kokesh's team alleges that police also assaulted Kokesh by kicking him to the floor when he politely asked to use the bathroom. Throughout the ordeal "police repeatedly showed a volatile desire to initiate aggressive, forceful conduct with detainees," according to the press release.

According to the InfoWars piece, news trucks were on the scene at the same time the cops rolled in, I guess to provide some Waco-style color coverage or something in case Kokesh turned out to be like Koresh and lit the cops up.
Now, I'm not going to hold up Alex Jones as some kind of unimpeachable source, because I think he's a self-promoting blowhard who's in it for the fame and fortune. Adam Kokesh also has something of a checkered past with being a bit of a whack job.

But Kokesh posts an anti-administration, pro-gun YouTube on July 4th and gets raided by a three-agency SWAT swarm with choppers and armored cars on the 9th? With news coverage? Over mushrooms? That right there is a whole lot of coincidence to swallow, that's all I'm saying.

Interesting the difference between the Washington Post coverage and the easily verified InfoWars story too. One might almost think somebody had something to hide, or had an ax to grind.

Cloward-Piven marches on. Forward!

The Phantom

Is our government more dangerous than a rattlesnake?

Yes. Yes it is.

I saw a rattlesnake this weekend right up next to the swimming dock at an acquaintance's cottage, where I had been invited to come hang out.  Large as life, a Massassauga rattler on the front yard. There were kids and dogs present. I was of the opinion that perhaps the front yard was not the place for venomous serpents. I was informed that the fine for disturbing said snake was more than the cottage was worth.

Today I looked it up. Turns out the max penalty for messing with one of those dog/kid killing machines is $250,000 AND/OR five years in jail. Now, to be clear, this is not the penalty for going out into a provincial park and killing one for sale. Nuh uh. This is the penalty for -moving- one off your front lawn, or "harassing" it, or capturing and releasing it someplace else (like, OFF your front lawn) or crushing the damn thing with a rock before it kills your two year old.

Here's what's happening to a guy who apparently did just that:

Whoever killed a rattlesnake while camping on Beausoleil Island could be facing a fine of $250,000 and up to five years in jail.
National Parks staff is investigating the crime after a visitor beat a massassauga rattlesnake to death while on the island for the long weekend. On July 1, staff in the Honeymoon Bay Campground at Georgian Bay Islands National Park found the dead snake. The massassauga rattlesnake is native to the area, and is an indicator of a healthy environment. The snake is classified as a threatened species, because its numbers are dwindling.
"We did an autopsy, and found broken bones, and the internal organs were pulverized. This was more than just someone prodding it, to frighten the snake," said Hugh Bremner, manager of resource conservation with the national park.
He said the body is now being held as evidence.
"They are timid, and avoid people if possible. They would only bite if they were provoked, or threatened."
There are two different ways the culprit could be charged, either a summary conviction, or an indictment. "A summary conviction is similar to a speeding ticket, and the charge is up to a $150,000 fine, or six months in jail, or both. An indictment is more serious, and has a maximum fine of $250,000, or five years in jail, or both. Both types charges can be held with trials."
$250,000 fine possible for snake killer.

Now they've picked out a patsy.

A Midland man will be appearing in court on Sept. 16, to face a charge of poaching, after an Eastern Massasauga rattlesnake was killed over the Canada Day weekend this year.
Mark McIntyre, senior park warden with the Georgian Bay Islands National Park, and its law enforcement specialist, said a man was charged after the rare slithering reptile was found dead at the park on July 1.
"He was taken into custody on Aug. 3, and was released, and charged with poaching in a national park, under the National Parks Act," said McIntyre.
The man, whose name has not been released to the press, can face a maximum fine of $250,000 and/or five years in jail, if faced with an indictment.

Get that? "Poaching" is the charge. Ministry of Natural Resources is taking this to the limit, even though whoever killed the thing clearly crushed it with a rock or other handy field expedient. By their own autopsy, we know this. They're "sending us a message" in legal parlance.

Message I'm getting? They spent more money on a dead snake than they do on a murder up in Jane and Finch, Toronto. Plus I seem to recall that some punk who recently got himself killed at Square One Mississauga had just got out of jail after less than five years on a murder rap. So one snake is considered to be worth more to the legal system than one dead human.

This is what I saw. Nice snakey, don't bite the child who's walking by...

Now, as for the behavior of the actual snake? "They are timid, and avoid people if possible. They would only bite if they were provoked, or threatened." Not wanting to be some kind of anti-government disturber of the peace or anything, but this description does not fit what I saw. What I saw was a venomous snake, coiled up in full-on strike posture, inching forward toward humans. We backed away from it, it came forward. As well, it did not have a proper rattle. Its rattle had been lost or broken off at some point, so there was no warning. The only reason we saw it was because it was sitting out on the rocks in full view, right in the middle of the high-traffic path to the swim dock.




This is not the behavior of a shy, retiring, fearful animal. More like the cranky predator that's boss of the block kinda animal. Mayyyyybe the whole official line about the "they would only bite if they were provoked, or threatened" thing might be slightly oversold? A little? Just to keep the proletariat firmly under thumb when they belong?  Just sayin'.

Remember the three "S"s my friends. Most important of which is the last one, "shut up!"

The Phantom

Belated update: Greetings to Black Mamba and visitors from Blazing Cat Fur.

UpdateII: Also we do have one typical smarmy liberal troll in the comments:

Anonymous said...

kill the snake - its self defense, they are a dangerous predator. If the park warden objects then he should be killed too.

Yeeeeah, because killing the snake and the park warden is what is being suggested here? Or is it more the knee-jerk stupidity of your typical Torontonian who couldn't tell a Massassauga rattler from a Mississauga hooker?  The type of pencil-necked black t-shirt/black jeans doofus who cannot separate the good idea of protecting a rare species from the bad idea of making the punishment for MURDER lighter than the punishment for killing a reptile. See them all over the place in Hogtown.

Hey doofus! How would you feel about a $250,000 fine for chasing a raccoon out of your garbage cans? Oh wait, you probably don't own a garmage can, right?  This is a better one: $250,000 fine and five years in jail for failure to show up at Church on Sunday three weeks in a row. Yeah, Now we're on to something!

Guardian UK increasingly becoming a Conservative newspaper?

The Guardian, that bastion of freakazoid Lefty progresive-osity is more and more these days starting to sound like a Conservative rag. Today's evidence:

Hollywood's refusal to stand up to Alec Baldwin is shameful

Alec Baldwin uses homophobic slurs against a gay Daily Mail journalist, and nobody says anything? Welcome to Tinseltown.

"Can you hear it? The stampede of Hollywood actors scrambling to condemn Alec Baldwin? The cacophony of icy tweets and acidic statements snarled by publicists like demented pantomime horses? That din of Tinseltown turning inwards when, in a rare fit of righteousness, of actually believing in something real and heartfelt and important, it stands up, en masse, to one of its own?
No? That'll be because there is no sound. Put a glass to your ear, press it up against the Hollywood sign and all you'll hear is the crashing Pacific – and of course, the daily wail of punctured dreams.
Baldwin, that tornado of toddler behaviour, still stands aloft, unscathed. This is after an incident of such violent, naked homophobia that it bears all the nuance of a brick lobbed through a gay bar"

Patrick Strudwick, the author, is appalled at the number of Hollywood types jumping to defend Alec Baldwin. He compares and contrasts this circling of the wagons to the ongoing Paula Deen slaughter, her eradication from public life because she said the "N" word once.

Alec Baldwin.

Alec Baldwin has the freedom to say and do literally anything he wants because he's a Leftist, he's famous, and because he supports all the correct causes with the correct amount of money. As in, lots and lots. Paula Deen by contrast is not a Leftist, has a Southern twang and probably didn't contribute a huge amount of money to Obama's re-election campaign.

But the real thing that Mr. Strudwick doesn't understand is that Alec Baldwin isn't a bad example of Hollywood lefty types, or lefties in general. The truth about the American Left is, they don't like fags. They hate 'em. They also don't like Blacks, Hispanics, union workers, women, Muslims, Jews, et cetera. Listen to a Big Lefty talk for ten minutes off camera, your ears will be assaulted by the most disgraceful blast of hate for pretty much everybody and everything you can imagine.

All completely normal and expected.

Dear Mr. Strudwick, welcome to the Post-Christian, Post-Western barbarism your paper has labored so long and hard to create. You've finally awoken to the ugly reality of your situation. Presto, you are now a Conservative. Congratulations.

The Phantom

Paula Deen is confused. She paid protection already, but look what happened!

Update: I am informed via the grapevine that Paula Deen was an Obama supporter. Making her time in the Political Correctness stocks all the more interesting.

Court of the media: Rachel Jeantel is innocent! Kill Zimmerman!

Here's five news stories on the George Zimmerman/Trayvon Martin case.

Global Grind A: http://globalgrind.com/news/what-white-people-dont-understand-about-rachel-jeantel-trayvon-martin-blog  "What White People Don't Understand About Rachel Jeantel"

Global Grind B: http://globalgrind.com/news/what-black-people-understand-about-rachel-jeantel-christina-coleman-blog "Why Black People Understand Rachel Jeantel"

Salon.com: http://www.salon.com/2013/06/27/the_smearing_of_rachel_jeantel/

Associated Press: http://hosted.ap.org/dynamic/stories/U/US_NEIGHBORHOOD_WATCH?SITE=AP&SECTION=HOME&TEMPLATE=DEFAULT&CTIME=2013-06-28-05-48-11

The Atlantic: http://news.yahoo.com/star-witness-black-rachel-jeantels-testimony-makes-trayvon-203324375.html;_ylt=A2KJ2UYScs1RS3EAlkbQtDMD  "My Star Witness Is Black: Rachel Jeantel's Testimony Makes Trayvon a Show Trial"

These news/opinion pieces all have one theme. Rachel Jeantel is getting a bulldozing at the Zimmerman trial because she's black. Trayvon Martin died because he was black. White people don't "get" Jeantel, and Zimmerman may walk because we are all racists.

I'm listening to Rammstein's "Engel" while I'm typing this. Despite being in another language and made in a foreign country, the Teutonic head banging is making a point down in my Scottish White Man guts that runs counterpoint to this line from Rachel Samara's piece:

Rachel's collision with Zimmerman's attorney Don West was uncomfortable to watch. They didn't get each other. I even thought at one point they were going to call in some type of translator. Yes, she mumbled, but the amount of times she was asked to repeat herself, speak up and slow down proved that they were indeed speaking different languages.

Sure they did. Like dogs get it about cats. We honkeys really do "get it" about Rachel Jeantel. What we get is that she's making this up as she goes along. We get that she's saying what she thinks will get George Zimmerman convicted. We get it, and it makes us contemptuous.

Bearing false witness is frowned upon in our culture, you might say. Like, there's a line about it on one of Moses' tablets. "Carved in stone", as it were.

Cutting to the chase here, my opinion is the following: If Rachel Jeantel is typical of black teens in that neighborhood, no freakin' wonder George Zimmerman was doing his Neighborhood Watch with a Glock. This woman (because at 19 you're not a freakin' kid anymore!) has been lying from the outset of the investigation. Furthermore her flat affect and slack jaw are not the neurological signs of consciousness, engagement and attention one sees in normal people. As in, normal BLACK people, to put a nice sharp point on it.  IMO.

The problems people are having with her testimony are not "cultural" in nature. The problem is she's not a credible witness. SHE WASN'T THERE. She was on the phone. She's changed her story a couple of times. She's obviously and overtly hostile toward Zimmerman and the court generally. That's enough right there to get her jettisoned off any reasonable witness list.

That the prosecutors are using her anyway is an indication of how weak their case is. Really, if this woman is on the stand they've got nothing except the race card to play. It comes down to this: Zimmerman is guilty of murder because Traaaaayvon was black and Zimmerman is a "White Hispanic". That's a pretty strong inditement against the prosecution all by itself. They're assholes. They should have thrown this out.

What "professional" Black People (writers who are Black as a profession, not professional writers who are black) don't understand (or won't admit) about White People: We don't give a rat's ass what colour you are if you're lying. Stand up and tell the truth or FUCK OFF. Its a Commandment.

The Phantom

Update! Welcome SDA and American Digest readers! And Five Feet of Fury too!
Upperdate: edited for clarity at 1:26pm June 30th.

Britain: the slippery slope picking up speed.

I don't comment much about the various Muslim agitations and atrocities here because I don't think they are very important, except to the people caught in them. Sure I have "Hot Girls and Bacon", but that's just a bit of fun. Most of the hits I get on those are from the Middle East, oddly enough.

This here situation though, this is symptomatic of the true problem we in the West are having right now.  Check it:

Two prominent US bloggers have been banned from entering the UK, the Home Office has said.

Pamela Geller and Robert Spencer co-founded anti-Muslim group Stop Islamization of America.

They were due to speak at an English Defence League march in Woolwich, where Drummer Lee Rigby was killed.

A government spokesman said individuals whose presence "is not conducive to the public good" could be excluded by the home secretary.

He added: "We condemn all those whose behaviours and views run counter to our shared values and will not stand for extremism in any form."

Now, Pamela Geller and Robert Spencer are not known to mince words regarding Muslim attacks on Western institutions and Western values. Little things like honor killings and the like really set them off, and they can be quite strident.

But then I'm pretty strident at times as well. Geller and Spencer haven't done anything I don't do on a daily basis here at the Soap Box. Or Kathy Shaidle, or Kate McMillan, or Ace of Spades, or any other conservative-leaning opinion blogger.

What just happened is that two members of a free country, America, got banned from Britain, a close allie and also supposed free country, because of their "views". In other words, the current regime in Britain is prepared to use their police powers to suppress comment on certain subjects, particularly when that comment is liable to be inconvenient.

In this case of course, following so closely after the murder of Lee Rigby by Islamists, the inconvenience will be rioting. By Islamists. Because the people going to hear the speechifying are English Defense League and UKIP types, who aren't much for rioting usually.

And that in a nutshell is the problem. Government employees finding free speech to be inconvenient and suppressing it, instead of simply keeping the peace by jailing rioters liken they are supposed to.

The slippery slope is getting steep. This is the part right before it goes vertical, kids. And remember, its not the fall that kills you. Its the sudden stop at the bottom.

The Phantom

Better living through bacon.

Mmmmm, bacon.

Had to post this. Its made of bacon!

South Fork Industries of Dalton Gardens, Idaho, took traditional bullets and coated them in pork-infused paint to make them "haram," or unclean, under Islamic law. The company's website labels the "Jihawg Ammo" bullets as "Peace Through Pork" and a "peaceful and natural deterrent to radical Islam." 

Bacon-flavored lead? Yes please!

http://www.jihawg.com/  American redneck ingenuity at its finest, pissing off all the right people.

The Phantom

Edward Snowden takes questions.

Some very interesting answers to some pointed questions about Snowden and the NSA here. Worth reading the whole thing.

Hopeful signs.

Obama regime astroturfing event faceplants at terminal velocity.

Last week, Obama's political action arm, Organizing For Action, held rallies throughout the country advocating for stricter gun laws. Their rallies drew small numbers as seen here and here. 

We can thank the vigilant San Bernardino Sun for putting a spotlight on perhaps the smallest of the rallies.

Protest pictured here just before the other two idiots showed up.

Organizing For Action picketed a gun show in Orange County California. With three guys. If the most they can come up with is three useful idiots to take their money, in California no less, I'd say that's a hopeful sign.

Idiot Leftist endangers kids to make a point. Must be Tuesday.

My Month With a Gun: Week One

Heidi Yewman, author and stupid person.

Yes, I bought a handgun and will carry it everywhere I go over the next 30 days. I have four rules: Carry it with me at all times, follow the laws of my state, only do what is minimally required for permits, licensing, purchasing and carrying, and finally be prepared to use it for protecting myself at home or in public.
Why? Following the Newtown massacre in December, the NRA's Wayne LaPierre, told the country, "The only thing that stops a bad guy with a gun is a good guy with a gun."  I wondered what would it be like to be that good guy with a gun? What would it be like to get that gun, live with that gun, be out and about with that gun. Finally, what happens when you don't want that gun any more?
I decided to find out.

Here's what she found out:

Today, I'm surrounded by five-year-old boys sitting with their moms at the next table. Now I'm the one with a gun on her hip. The gun makes me more fearful than I could have imagined.
In some way, I feel a certain vindication. I was right to protest Starbucks policy. Today, they have a woman with absolutely no firearms training and a Glock on her hip sitting within arm's reach of small children, her hands shaking and adrenaline surging.

Translation, she's an incompetent idiot with a shaky grasp on reality who is complaining that Big Brother won't stop her from endangering others with her incompetence and incipient lunacy.

If she was one of my relations I'd slap her. How selfish and stupid is this woman?

The SLAP HER! Phantom.

Why do Lefties always assume Big Government will be on -their- side?

LAX TSA officer to 15 year old girl: "Cover yourself!"

Dear Lefties, you are not the only intolerant statists in the world. What on earth make you think religious fruitloops won't get jobs in the Big Brother Corps and push your skinny little Lefty asses around?

Definitely a thong wearer, am I right?.

By the way? Lulu Lemmon see-through yoga pants and a too-small tank top are -not- an appropriate travel outfit for a 15 year old girl on a school outing with no parents. You're welcome.

The Helpful Phantom

Update: Some boneheaded Grrrrl thinks this bit of official harassment is a reason to "Be Shameless!" Like that's going to help.

Some of the comments are hilarious! From "Azteclady":

Where, pray tell, is the responsibility of the attacker?
You are implying that it’s the responsibility of women to keep themselves safe–is it not the responsibility of men NOT to attack women?

Man, you just can't make this stuff up.

Here's what's really going on with the NSA thing.

Here is a map showing the actual scope of what has been revealed the last week or so on the NSA spying thing.

The map, called Boundless Informant, is among documents released by Edward Snowden, a former CIA employee and NSA contractor who says he is the person who this month leaked information about the U.S. metadata collection program known as PRISM.

About 3 billion pieces of metadata information were collected in a 30-day period, the map shows. That data includes calls made, location of the phone, time of the call and duration.

A handbook for the map says it uses "big data technology" to "produce near real-time business intelligence."

If you know time and location, you can physically track people. What this doesn't say is that you don't have to be making or taking a call on your phone for the cell network to track you. Your phone does that every few seconds the whole time its turned on.

In Canada? Yep you betcha!

The Globe and Mail reported Monday, Defence Minister Peter MacKay authorized Canada's super-secret Communications Security Establishment (CSE) to conduct its own "metadata" surveillance program in November 2011.

So, this gives whoever has access to this system the ability to track anybody they want, 24/7/365, in real-time or back in history for as long ans the data goes. We have other mentions in the news that this has been going on in Canada since at least 2005. That's what we -know-.

So there you go. Think up what -you- would do with 24/7 tracking of anyone you want since 2005, that's probably less than half of what they can actually do right now.

This is what I voted CPC in the election to PREVENT, and I'm sorely disappointed.  CPC take note.

The Phantom

Oh look, a convenient study! People LIKE ubiquitous surveillance.

A convenient study from the Pew Research Center for People and the Press.  "Majority Views NSA Phone Tracking as Acceptable Anti-terror Tactic"

Interesting datum from withing the study, as noted on the Drudge Report, DemocRat partisans like the NSA under Obama, hated it under Bush. Table from the article:


The convenient part comes in when you consider that the Bush admin statement says they were getting court orders, while the Obama admin are not. One of those is not like the other.

Next table:



Convenient again, because as we know considerable monitoring of guys they KNEW were dirty did not prevent the Boston Marathon bombing. Ask the question plainly, "Should government be able to monitor EVERYTHING YOU DO ON-LINE for purposes unstated?"

Funny how these types of studies pop up suddenly whenever Barry steps on his whatsit.

The Phantom

Big Brother Finally Hits The News Cycle.

As we know from about a zillion blog posts and minor news stories scattered around the web since 1998 or so, Big Brother is tapping your web activity.  Lately we have had news that Big Brother is recording -everything- that we do on-line, from phone calls to Google searches.

From the main stream media we have heard muted mutterings of "yeah, they might be kinda listening sometimes." Should be front page and top of the hour on every outlet that every freakin' thing you do on-line gets recorded and archived -forever!- by American government agencies, but all we get are these little breadcrumbs.

So finally a -BRITISH- newspaper has been unable to ignore the stinking dung pile any longer, and has gone public.  Its all over Drudge.

The National Security Agency has obtained direct access to the systems of Google, Facebook, Apple and other US internet giants, according to a top secret document obtained by the Guardian.
The NSA access is part of a previously undisclosed program called PRISM, which allows officials to collect material including search history, the content of emails, file transfers and live chats, the document says.
The Guardian has verified the authenticity of the document, a 41-slide PowerPoint presentation – classified as top secret with no distribution to foreign allies – which was apparently used to train intelligence operatives on the capabilities of the program. The document claims "collection directly from the servers" of major US service providers.
Although the presentation claims the program is run with the assistance of the companies, all those who responded to a Guardian request for comment on Thursday denied knowledge of any such program.
In a statement, Google said: "Google cares deeply about the security of our users' data. We disclose user data to government in accordance with the law, and we review all such requests carefully. From time to time, people allege that we have created a government 'back door' into our systems, but Google does not have a back door for the government to access private user data."

Perhaps a bit less so at the New York Slimes.

PRISM is the new search word my friends. And don't forget about CARNIVORE and all that other alphabet soup. CARNIVORE is so old they retired it in 2005.

Its official now. Big Brother knows what pr0n sites you visited in 2009. And 2003. And probably 1997 for that matter. They have the Great Mother of all keyword searchable databases with all this crap stuffed in a series of server farms someplace, probably a hundred acres of blade racks consuming the entire electrical output of a 1000 megawatt coal fired generating station. Enough waste heat to keep New York City warm in January.

Google server farm, now under NSA management.

Remember, this is just what we KNOW they're doing. The mind boggles at what they might be doing we don't know about. Enemies lists? Tapping political party phone calls? Given the IRS I think we can assume "YES!" on both those possibilities.

And hey Americans, the very best part? They're listening to you with YOUR money. They're listening to -me- with your money too, and I'm not even American. Isn't that special?

The Phantom

From our "Trigger Happy Cops" file...

If you're an armed civilian, keep that roscoe covered when the cops are around. The life you save may be your own.

Those close to the family say the victim lived nearby and heard his neighbor's burglar alarm. Neighbor Jerry Wayne Waller then apparently went outside to see what was going on.

The 72-year-old man didn't even make it to the house across the street before he was shot. He died on his own property.

The elderly man, who was armed at the time, was shot and killed in his own driveway by police responding to a burglary call. "We heard five shots," Haskin recalled. They were just rapid fire one after the other."

Just bear this in mind the next time you feel like going and checking on that noise or that weird guy hanging around. The cops are a hell of a lot more likely to shoot you than any robber ever will be.

Oh, and the cop who shot this old man pop pop pop pop pop? He or she is going to walk. I prophesy this. It'll be workplace stress or some such bullshit, but the cop will stroll.

I also prophesy that there will be no violent demonstrations, car burnings or other uproar over this obscene execution. Not now, and not when the cops are acquitted. It'll just be "one of those things".

Which may be a bad thing in the long run. I mean, if WHITE people went and burnt some cop cars and maybe burnt down the local cop shop the odd time over something like this, maybe the friggin' cops would learn some trigger control and "check your target-check your backstop" drills. And maybe they'd put schmucks like this shooter on the rubber-gun squad BEFORE they kill some old guy in a PTSD flashback. There's no excuse for this shit. None.

The Phantom

Woolwich: why no help for the victim? Two words for ya.

Yesterday a whole bunch of people watched two Muslim freaks cut a guy's head off while yelling Allah Akbar, and then watched them stand around for twenty minutes while they told people to take their picture.

Now, on the internet today there are a variety of people bemoaning the lack of any man in the crowd with guts enough to stand up to these two cowardly murderers. Wondering why nobody in England has any balls anymore.

Here's your answer: Tony Martin.

Don't want to end up like THIS, do ya?

They all stood there, every one of them thinking to himself "If get into this, I'll go to jail for sure." And they were 100% right. The guy who capped one of those pricks WOULD go to jail in England.

Ask yourself what's scarier. Two skinny assholes with knives and a crappy pistol, or Her Majesty's Ministry of Justice? MoJ for sure, that's a no brainer.

So if you plan on traveling to Britain anytime soon, just remember: ain't nobody going to help you if trouble starts. Its illegal.

The Phantom

Face punching JF Sergant redux: Educating the young.

Well, I had some comments on Five Reasons I Should Punch JF Sargent In The Face. One for, two against.

First, the two against. Lets look at their arguments.

Kier said some things.

First: "So disagreeing with someone over pop culture is license to punch them in the face now?"

An extremely passive/aggressive method of claiming my argument to be of no value, which is notable in how completely it misses the point of what I said. This is not an argument about pop culture, this is an argument about JF Sargent's claim of racism against a large group, of which I am one member.

Then: "Even in the words were meant as an insult directly to you (and they certainly weren't) that's all they are-- words."

Again, the passive/aggressive calling into question of me, my argument, plus a new assertion that "words" are of no consequence. No support for his assertion of course, we're just supposed to take it on faith that words are of no consequence.

And finally: "As for punching the author in the face just because you perceive an insult that's not even there, no man. That's ridiculous."

Finally, an actual strong statement. My perceptions are incorrect, there was no insult, and I'm ridiculous for wanting to punch JF Sargent in the face. Argument from invisible and unstated authority. "Everybody knows" that's ridiculous.

The other guy is "anonymous", his argument is much lamer. First: "Yeah... you know he wasn't specifically addressing you right"

Um, yeah. I know. He's addressing a class of numerous individuals. Of which I am but one. We covered this.

Second: "But 1960 was during Jim Crow, so... http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Jim_Crow_laws"

This is just stupid.  FF#1 came out in November 1961. The laws that finished all the Jim Crow bullshit were the Civil Rights Act of 1964^[1] and the Voting Rights Act of 1965. The movement to finally end discrimination against Black people had fully taken over the country by 1961 when Lee and Kirby published FF#1. The only holdouts were hard core Democrats.

So to recap, "words are just words", "he wasn't insulting you personally anyway", and (being generous) "the 1960's really were racist".

Words are just words.  By extension, comics are just comics and movies are just movies. Except when they're an attack on the character of an entire class of people. Except when movies are two hundred million dollar instruments of propaganda, being used to further a particular political agenda.

Looking at what JF Sargent said, piece by piece (and leaving out the lame asides and feeble jests):

"News has broken that Michael B. Jordan is being considered to play Johnny Storm (The Human Torch) in the upcoming Fantastic Four reboot. Naturally, comic book fans across the Internet are furious... because Michael B. Jordan is black. And in the comics, Johnny Storm is white.  But these Fantastic Four fans aren't mad because they're racist (they insist). No, their reasons are much more complicated, because ..."

#5 "It's Not About Race."  See, these complaints aren't about the character's race; they're about not changing the character's race. If that sounds confusing and contradictory, that's because it is.

Except that it isn't. Sargent quotes two different fans (alleged anyway) who make the argument I did, that Hollywood execs constantly do this chopping and changing stories, and it always sucks. One example of  a book bastardized beyond recognition by Hollywood springs forcibly to mind, Heinlein's Starship Troopers. Sticking a black guy in as Johnny Storm is the same crap they always do. It never works, and its always annoying to fans who just want to see the damn book/comic/whatever done as it already exists. They don't want to see some schmuck's bright idea of how to stroke all the right target groups in some marketing campaign. Every time a popular book or comic crashes and burns as a big budget movie, this shit is why.

What does that piece of historically verifiability get us here?

"Revealing that a big chunk of our fans are racist cockholes" doesn't seem like a great publicity stunt to us, but that's probably why we're not big-city publicists."

 

Nice!

#4. "You May as Well Just Change Everything Then!"  ...making Sue taller and changing Reed's hair color don't sound that weird to us because, you know, they're fictional people.

Yes they are. From a storyline that's been going on since 1962. That's the story we want to see, not some bullshit that got thrown together based on some executive's lame-ass, warmed over re-do of the same thing that sucked last time. But if you think that's true, you're a "racist cockhole."

Definitely need to punch this asshole.

#3. "This Ruins the Lore!"  Since Sue Storm (the Invisible Woman) is Johnny's sister, many objectors have pointed out that making Johnny black will mean that Sue must also be black, at which point the Earth will apparently explode...  ... which you should probably be thankful for, actually, because once people start trying to defend why having a black Sue Storm is a bad idea, things get awful pretty fast...

In other words, if you liked the Fantastic Four the way it was written, and not the New Improved Fantastic Huxtables that Mr. Sargent is all excited about, you're a "racist cockhole". 

#2. "It's Unrealistic!"  "If the silliest part of a movie about interdimensional gods with magic lightning hammers is that one of them is black, you are clearly racist."

Or maybe, just maybe, people are complaining its unrealistic because its a glaring non-sequitur. As in, it doesn't follow from the story line. Having one character be black in a white family -for no discernible reason- disrupts the narrative and makes the movie annoying. Why is Heimdall black in the Thor movie? Because they needed to stick in a black guy for marketing, not because it follows from the plot. Its Norse mythology, there are no black guys. Glaring plot hole, adds nothing to the story. Why is it there? Racism. People are afraid of being smeared with it.

#1. "Why Don't We Make Black Characters White, Then?"   "...because everybody likes comic books, not just white people."  "So actually, maybe racist nerds do have a good reason to be angry -- they're angry because the comic industry has outgrown them."

Why don't we make male characters female then? Why don't we make them ponies, everybody likes ponies right? Why don't we change every possible detail about the story to fit whatever bullshit political and marketing strategy the green-light guys come up with? Because then it won't be the comic book everybody likes. It won't be John Carter of Mars the famous and successful classic book, it'll be the Disney John Carter which lost so much money it nearly broke the studio. 

 

But I can't have that opinion, JF Sargent said. I'm a RACIST NERD for thinking that.

That's five things you'd get punched for if you said them to a random stranger in a bar. People really do get punched for saying shit like this. I've knocked guys down for less, and I'm not a particularly violent man. 

 

Because this isn't about a movie. Its not about race. Its about leveling a dire insult at an entire group of people because you think you're better than they are. Smarter. More moral. Racists are people its ok to hate, to revile. You label a whole group like that and make it stick, you can do pretty much anything you want to them. Beat them up, take their stuff, whatever. Hey they're RACISTS, they deserve it.

Words have meaning. They have weight and power greater than any bullet. Ask a Japanese man who lived in Canada during WWII, they'll tell you. Ask any Russian. Ask a Jew. They know.

 

Questions, comments from the hipster gallery?

Vince Li needs to get out more.

Do we all remember Mr. Vince Li, the friggin' nutjob that cut off Tim McLean's head on a Greyhound bus in 2008? And then ATE him? Yeah?  Ok then, get ready for this:

A man who beheaded a fellow Canadian bus passenger should be allowed to spend more supervised time in the outside world, his treatment team recommends. Two psychiatrists taking care of Vince Li at the Selkirk Mental Health Center told a review board that Li has stopped having hallucinations and has been a model patient, the Canadian Broadcasting Corp. reported.

Yep, poor ol' Vince baby is getting all poorly from being cooped up in the looney bin there, and he needs to go for walkies out with the rest of us. None of us predicted that, did we?

I feel for the guy. Really, I do. And I think he should be able to have his "supervised" community visits. I have only one condition. Vincent Li can hang out here with me on the same day ALL the Canadian laws against concealed carry of firearms get repealed. If he gets to come out of lockup, I get to carry a .45 Colt. In honor of Tim McLean, if nothing else.

I think that's eminently fair. Don't you?

The Phantom

Update: Missing Ancaster man found dead.

Tim Bosma has been found. Sadly it was too late, police discovered his body in Waterloo. One man is in custody and presently charged with the murder of Mr. Bosma, police are continuing their investigation to discover any accomplices.

Google it to discover any unseemly details, the little bit I saw was more than what I really wanted to know.

One detail that is worth spreading as far as possible, Tim Bosma had no known connection to the man charged with his murder. As well, Mr. Bosma has no record with police. He was a good man, with a good family. Utterly random happenstance that these killers picked him.

The Phantom

Five reasons I should punch J.F. Sargent in the face.

What is it about comics these days that pushes all my piss-off buttons? I think the fact that the medium has been hijacked by a bunch of Lefty propagandists who have no respect.

Latest annoyance courtesy of Kathy Shaidle at Five Feet of Fury, who posted an excellent snarky comeback in response to this piece of Leftist hipster assholery by  J.F. Sargent :

The 5 Most Insulting Defenses of Nerd Racism.

News has broken that Michael B. Jordan (Chronicle) is being considered to play Johnny Storm (The Human Torch) in the upcoming Fantastic Four reboot. Naturally, comic book fans across the Internet are furious, because they've had it with all the reboots and just want to preserve the magic of the 2005 original -- oh, wait, no. They're angry because Michael B. Jordan is black. And in the comics, Johnny Storm is white. But these Fantastic Four fans aren't mad because they're racist (they insist). No, their reasons are much more complicated, because ...

...and then he goes on to list five completely bullshit excuses to call ME a racist.

Because yeah, I used to read a lot of comics. and yeah, I liked Fantastic Four. And hell yeah, I think the notion of casting Michael B. Jordan as Johnny Freakin' Storm in an FF movie makes exactly as much sense as casting Latoya Jackson to play Harry Potter. Or John Hurt as Shaft.

Oh wait, I'm not allowed to make that argument, because its RACIST!.

#1 "Why Don't We Make Black Characters White, Then?"

"The thing is, the only reason these characters were white in the first place was that comic books were created in a time when nobody would have printed a book about a non-white superhero (having female superheroes was difficult enough, and they were handled with something less than dignity). But nowadays, the people responsible for these characters are trying to make their properties as inclusive and welcoming as they possibly can, because everybody likes comic books, not just white people."

Uhm, dude, the Fantastic Four was created in the 1960's, not during Jim Crow. So really, just fuck off.

Of course what its really about is power tripping studio corner office types who think they're smarter than... well EVERYBODY. Smarter than Stan Lee and Jack Kirby, for sure. Smarter than the audience, who all either know who Johnny Storm is supposed to be or don't care at all about the Fantastic Four. That would be ladies more than eighty years old like my mother, or recent immigrants who don't know what a comic book is. Illiterate goat herders from the Somali desert, for example.

Everybody who would ever give a shit to see a Fantastic Four movie knows Johnny Storm is a blonde white guy. But some RETARD is trying to make his way up the greased pole at Disney by playing PC politics with characters. That is the -only- reason for making that decision.

Why does this upset me? Because I like the Fantastic Four. I would like to go see a Fantastic Four movie that does not SUCK. I would like to see a Fantastic Four movie that is fun and exciting the way Iron Man was. The way Spider Man was. The way The Avengers was. Hell, even Superman.

A Fantastic Four movie with a black guy playing Johnny Storm? That will not be the movie I want to see. It will suck, because clearly the production will have no respect for the source material. It will suck even harder than the Thunderbirds movie directed by Johnathon Frakes back in 2004. And that's saying something, because that flick lost thirty million bucks due to sucking like a two dollar hooker.

Johnny Storm as a black guy? Genius! They can cast RuPaul as The Thing, Carol Pope from Rough Trade can be Susan Storm (what do you mean she's too old? Ageist!)  and Mr. Fantastic can be George Takei  in a wheelchair! Cover all the bases.

No? It'll be stupid, you say? You're such a racist.

On the bright side, when the new Fantastic Four movie crashes harder than John Carter of Mars, and for exactly the same stupid ass reason, and  loses a hundred MILLION dollars, and ends up in the $5.99 bin at Walmart six months after its release, Disney will fire the living shit out of Mr. Corner Office. All I have to do to ensure that happy outcome is stay the hell home and save my money. Which I will most certainly do.

The Racist Phantom. (Whatcha gonna do about it, hipsters?)

 Update: Welcome hipster dweebs. Please read the arguments -carefully- before spouting off in the comments section. Work on that reading comprehension, gentlemen. 

Upperdate: Well, here we are in July 2014 and this post is still getting traffic. Comics movies are if anything even more full of shit than before. The new Pinacle of Perversity is DC's Wonder Woman. First teaser picture of Princess Diana is a skinny little girl in bondage leather. Because OBVIOUSLY the Amazons would be right into the S&M scene, right? And obviously a woman who was practically born with a sword in one hand and a bow in the other would have little teensy arms like pipe cleaners and delicate little clavicle bones like a sparrow.

Upperupperdate: I'm confused now.

Why yes, the IRS -does- have an official enemies list.

IRS admits that they've been deliberately targeting Conservative groups. No, not on The Onion.

The Internal Revenue Service inappropriately flagged conservative political groups for additional reviews during the 2012 election to see if they were violating their tax-exempt status, a top IRS official said Friday.
Organizations were singled out because they included the words "tea party" or "patriot" in their applications for tax-exempt status, said Lois Lerner, who heads the IRS division that oversees tax-exempt groups.
In some cases, groups were asked for their list of donors, which violates IRS policy in most cases, she said.
"That was wrong. That was absolutely incorrect, it was insensitive and it was inappropriate. That's not how we go about selecting cases for further review," Lerner said at a conference sponsored by the American Bar Association.
"The IRS would like to apologize for that," she added.
Lerner said the practice was initiated by low-level workers in Cincinnati and was not motivated by political bias. After her talk, she told The AP that no high level IRS officials knew about the practice. She did not say when they found out.

Oh, and if you believe Lois Lerner about the "not motivated by political bias" thing, I understand she has a bridge in Brooklyn she'd like to sell.

The Phantom