And now, a knife license. In Calgary, no less.

We used to make this knife license joke 30 years ago every time somebody said "gun license." I blame us for that, we couldn't understand we weren't dealing with rational human beings.

So here we are, 2024, and some appalling fools are demanding you get a license to buy a knife in Calgary Alberta.

From the article, their "reasoning."

"What's happening here is very alarming," said Ashley Salvador, councillor for Ward Métis during an urban planning committee meeting on Tuesday."As we heard today, you walk in, and right next to the chocolate bars is a wall of knives that are designed for harm," said Ashley Salvador, councillor for Ward Métis.

Because "a wall of knives that are designed for harm" needs a picture to go with it.

 

And...

Bryan LaFleche, president of Crystal Kids Youth Centre also spoke at the meeting to express how prevalent knives, as well UnWTas brass knuckles and bear spray have become amongst the kids at the centre, which they have to confiscate regularly. "When we ask them: 'Why are you carrying a knife? Why are you carrying bear spray?' The answer every single time is 'it's for protection'," LaFleche told the committee. "Our great fear with that is when an 11-year-old child pulls a six-inch knife out of his knapsack and says 'I need this for protection,' we spend hours trying to convince them that that knife affords them absolutely no protection."

 

It's funny how kids can tell when they're being lied to, eh?

 

Then in literally the next breath:

Allan Bolstad with the Alberta Avenue Community League purchased several knives at a convenience store on 118th Avenue to present the committee with a slideshow illustrating the intended purpose of the knives being sold. "When you hold these knives, when you actually have them in your hand, you realize how lethal that they are, and that they're designed for one thing and that's for hurting someone badly, or killing someone," said Bolstad.  "These aren't for buttering toast. They're for trying to kill someone." Bolstad suggested the city create a separate business licence for stores looking to sell   knives, akin to the one currently in place for selling firearms.

So, depending which side of their mouths they're talking out of, either a knife provides "absolutely no protection" or they are "lethal." Palpably lethal, according to Mr. Allan Bolstad. You just pick it up and you can feeeeeel how it was made to kill somebody.

Here's a picture of Mr. Allan Bolstad. Scroll all the way down to the bottom. As it says in the article, he'd also like to license builders and so forth. Because nothing on this Earth should be allowed to move or sit still without a license. You can see how he looks like the kind of guy who would think something like that. 

 

Here's another one, with him posing heroically in front of what was probably a business once, driven under by socialists.

 

Mr. Bolstad, keeping weed-grown lots vacant in Alberta!

Because there oughta be a law. Right? Keep them lots vacant, Allan.