Shoes are what's important to the media.

The New York Times continues to wonder why we mock them.

When is a shoe not just a shoe?

When it is a pair of very high, needle-thin heels worn by the first lady of the United States on her way to the site of a natural disaster. Then it becomes a symbol for what many see as the disconnect between the Trump administration and reality; another example of the way in which this president and his family continue to define "appropriate" their own way; and an excuse for partisan name-calling.

Or so became apparent Tuesday morning when President Trump and his wife left the White House to fly to Texas for a briefing on the devastation caused by Hurricane Harvey, and Mrs. Trump appeared on the lawn in black pegged trousers, black shades, an olive green bomber jacket — and her stilettos, now a trademark. Very much the same kind of shoes, in other words, she has been wearing since long before she joined her husband on the campaign trail.

They are complaining about what the First Lady is wearing when she's getting on Air Force One in Washington.

Did Melania, who was most certainly not going to be bucking sandbags or ladling soup, wear the offensive heels at the disaster?

Though by the time the plane had landed Mrs. Trump looked altogether more grounded, in white sneakers and crisp white shirt, with a ponytail pulled through a black baseball cap emblazoned with the word "FLOTUS," during her time in the air the original shoes went from being mere footwear to objects of vilification thanks to social media's specific kind of alchemy.

So that's a no, then. Why even bother writing the article?

It is precisely the superficial nature of clothing, the fact that garments are immediately accessible to all, that makes them the go-to stand-in for more nuanced, complicated emotions and issues.

Translation: they hate Trump and they'll use any excuse, no matter how flimsy, to take a shot at him.

Dear Media, this is why your circulation numbers continue to circle the bowl. There's a Biblical flood wrecking a major city, and you worthless assholes are wasting everyone's time with bitchy high school girl gossip.

The Phantom

Update: Kate McMillan's comment on this farce is way better than mine.