Prepare for a new wave of Scots immigrants.

Yes friends, I believe the time is drawing nigh for a new Scots diaspora, as everyone with half a brain flees the coming catastrophe.  Here are the signs and portents du jour:

Young trainee officers at Strathclyde Police search social networking sites for pictures of people posing with weapons, mainly knives.
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The man in charge of this, Superintendent Bob Hamilton, says there are two ways of dealing with people once they've been tracked down.

If they were posing in a public place, like on the street or a park, the law has been broken and they'll be arrested.

Even when pictures are taken in private, though, which isn't technically breaking the law, he says the weapons are so dangerous his officers pay a visit to the people involved.

"We show the parents their pictures," he explained, "recover the weapons and make sure they know that behaviour is unacceptable.

"We have large kitchen knives, axes, samurai swords, baseball bats, a huge number and different type of weapons - in simple terms weapons that can kill."

"Large kitchen knives", forsooth. If this guy showed up in my kitchen he'd probably have a friggin' hernia.

I believe there is only one thing to be done here.  Everybody reading this needs to post a picture of themselves with a paring knife, Boy Scout hatchet or stick of wood, and give it the caption, "Come and get me, copper."  Send it to Superintendent Bob "the knob" Hamilton c.o. the Strathclyde Police Force. 

The Phantom